This is the story of the most difficult time of our lives. May the telling of it bring hope to others and help me to heal.
8/3/03 Sunday 6 pm
Yesterday my mother told me that when my sister was seriously ill as a child, a nurse told her to look for any small increment of improvement, no matter how tiny, and if she saw a small improvement every day, that meant that the healing process had begun. She said that the improvements would eventually grow larger and larger each day and then the full healing would come.
Today, we saw a rather large improvement. Twice, he has gone 7 hours between pain shots. This is significant. The other good news we received is that there was no blood in his stool this morning. That is excellent news.
Jesse and I went to church today and the people were so sweet, hugging me and telling me that they are praying. And Sue said that the deacons are just waiting to help us financially and that I should call when I need to. Counting our parents, we have gotten 3 offers to help us financially and we haven’t even needed it yet. Plus I received a letter from the IRS informing me that Bush has passed a law and we are going to receive a $400 check from the government! God is so good!
We had a big breakthrough today and it all began with a snake in the laundry room!
After church, we went grocery shopping and then came home and put everything away. I had just put bread in the toaster for a sandwich, when Angie started barking in the laundry room. Due to past experiences with mice, we always pay attention when she barks. I looked, expecting to see a mouse and there was a snake looking at me with his tongue flicking. I could tell it wasn’t a copperhead but I didn’t know whether it was a cottonmouth because I could only see its head. I immediately called our pastor because he lives the closest to us.
The wait seemed so long. I was afraid, but I told Jesse that we must not let it get into the rest of the house. I thought that it was symbolic of what we have been going through and I knew that if it got into the rest of the house, I would feel terrorized again. We changed into jeans and sturdier shoes as we took turns guarding it. It was behind the washer in the corner by the kitchen. We got brooms and sticks because it wasn’t afraid when we stomped our feet. Jesse was calm and cool throughout the whole thing.
I was afraid but then something came over me. Looking back, I believe that the Holy Spirit came on me with tremendous power and authority. I was in the kitchen with Jesse “guarding” the snake and I began to do spiritual warfare. I told Satan that we belong to Jesus and that he had no right to be in that house. A phrase that a friend had said to me came to mind and I told him that I was going to “cut his head off.” I was furious! I was furious and I had had enough! It was going to end!
The pastor came with gloves and a machete. And the snake was nowhere to be found! He moved the washer and looked under things and said that it wasn’t there. He said it was gone and was about to leave, and I pointed out that it might have crawled up under the washer, so he said to turn it on to the spin cycle. I began to pray that God would let us kill it, because I wanted evidence of its death. When we turned the washer on, the snake came out from hiding. I closed the door to the kitchen and stood in the kitchen with a stick because I didn’t want it to get into the rest of the house.
The pastor, his son, and Jesse were in the laundry room and once again I heard them say, “I don’t see it. Where did it go?” I was praying out loud, commanding it to manifest itself, telling it that we were going to cut its head off. And the next thing I knew, the pastor had it cornered. We didn’t know what to do next, and then he told us to all get out of the house, so we ran out but he didn’t follow. When I turned to look, I saw that the door had shut. There he was standing in the laundry room holding the snake by the tail and keeping its head away from himself with a broom! Behind a closed door! I opened the door and he brought the snake out.
I knew he was planning on letting it go and I knew that I needed to cut its head off. I kept saying (yelling), “We have to cut its head off! We have to cut its head off! This is symbolic!” He held it on the ground and I waited a minute, thinking that he or Jesse would do it but when they didn’t (the pastor couldn’t because his hands were full), I picked up the machete and began to strike it. As I chopped its head off, I was yelling things like, “Satan, you will NOT hurt this family anymore! We cut your head off! You leave us alone! We belong to Jesus!” It took a long time and a lot of work before its head was finally severed. After it was over, Jesse got his snake book and we determined that it was a black rat snake and not a cottonmouth. We measured it – with difficulty – and it was 4 feet long.
As I helped Jesse measure it, he was holding the tail and the body was still moving. He kept saying, “It’s so strong! It’s so strong!” He was amazed that a “dead” body could have so much apparent strength left in it – so much so that it looked alive. After we measured it, we were standing there looking at the writhing body and the lifeless, severed head. I told him to look and remember because this is what Satan does to us. We cut off his head but he wants us to think he is still alive and strong and can hurt us. I’ll never forget that picture.
To me, this whole incident was so symbolic. The pastor and three elders came to pray for Phil about an hour later, and Phil said that as the pastor told them about the snake incident, they were all sober and agreed with Phil that there is a spiritual component to this.
I think that it was interesting that it was my pastor who came. I have authority but I am also under authority. And I couldn’t have gotten it out of the house alone. There are times when we need help from those in authority over us.
Phil pointed out that it was a black snake, which had no bite to it and could not have hurt us. Satan scares us into thinking that he can harm us but if we belong to Jesus, he has no real power over us.
Jean said that I need to persist in telling Satan that his head has been cut off. Another friend said that at this point in time, Phil is healed. She said that we will have to wait for the manifestation of it but there is no life left in this thing. She said she saw me stomping around the house praying out loud. I told her that when I saw the pictures in the snake book, I wondered, “Why didn’t I know what this was?” And she said that when the doctor finally diagnoses this, he too will wonder, “Why didn’t I know what this was?”
What a day this has been! It’s obviously not going to be smooth-sailing from here on out, but I believe that something significant has happened. And God will give me grace to get through each day.
I have stilled and quieted my soul like a weaned child. Ps. 131:2
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