Thanksgiving 2

Jesse and Krissy came over for Thanksgiving 2 and it was truly wonderful! Things fell into place more smoothly than I ever remember and the food seemed to taste better too. We had delicious, moist turkey, fresh green beans, my special stuffing, 2 kinds of mashed potatoes (butter and roasted garlic), flaky crescent rolls, and cherry cheesecake and dark rum pecan pie for dessert. We talked together and watched 2 movies. They had never seen "Air Force One" and seemed to enjoy it.

When Krissy told me that she wanted so much to get a small Christmas tree, I told her they could use ours because, for the time being, I am putting up a manger instead of a tree and ours is just the right size for their apartment. I also gave them the small tub of ornaments I had been saving for Jesse since he was a baby. That felt good.

Every year since my kids were little, I have been making 4 ornaments, usually cross stitched, for Christmas - one for us and one for each of them. Most of them have the years on them and it was fun to be able to actually finally give them to Jesse.

Now for a turkey sandwich (the BEST part) ... Gotta love those leftovers!

Thanksgiving 1

It was a peaceful, restful day and the rain all day long added to the cozy ambiance. We ate lemon-pepper chicken from the Walmart deli, which we had been wanting to try for a long time, and it was moist and incredibly delicious. Dessert was a dark rum pecan pie - yum!

I made a cherry cheesecake for tomorrow (a request from my son) and snapped the green beans to prepare them for cooking. Tomorrow will be Thanksgiving 2.

I finished stitching a small ornament for a friend and started on another one. Several days ago, I finished The Dove. It was a kit I bought and, after many false starts, I finally "forced" myself to work on it beginning last month and then I was hooked. As much as I strained to finish it (much like giving birth), I missed it when it was finished.

Off to bed now because I have to get up early to put the turkey in the oven ...

Technology

I love technology, especially computer-related technology! I never cease to be amazed at the new and wonderfully useful things that appear in the stores. I bought a Logitech Wireless Mouse (M215) and it is absolutely wonderful! The touchpad on my laptop "caved in" and that seemed like a big problem but the problem is solved! This mouse has a tiny little USB connector that doesn't get in the way of anything because you hardly even notice it's there. And it works on just about any surface. I wondered where I would use it since I didn't have a mouse pad by my laptop (because it's on my lap!) but it turns out that it doesn't even matter because this mouse works on the arm of my recliner, on the part of my computer that is by the touchpad, and even on my clothes! I love technology! The mouse will live in the pocket of my armchair organizer thingy and be very useful every day.

Halloween

I am so sick and tired of Halloween everything!!! This happens every year. I read that it is now the number 2 most commercial holiday of the year. It brings in tons on money and even the churches have embraced it.

Because of the legalism that God has been setting me free from, I asked Him what He thought about Halloween ... And, while I was at it, about Christians practicing yoga, because I have been wrong about so many things. First of all, He showed me how much He loves His children, even those who are doing these things. That is first and most important - I am not to judge anyone just because they think and do things differently than me.

This morning on the way to work, I started asking myself whether or not Jesus would celebrate Halloween. If He was here on the earth, would He go to the Halloween parties given by area churches, would He dress up in a costume, carve a pumpkin, etc.?

When I asked myself those questions, the answer became clear for me. I don't believe that Jesus would participate in a celebration of evil and to me, that's what it is - a celebration of evil. I believe that spiritual forces of evil really do exist and they are opposed to God. And I cannot in good conscience practice yoga either, since it springs from Hinduism, a religion where they worship false gods.

So I have my answers - for me, these things are detestable and I want no part of them, but I am not to judge other believers who participate in them. Which leaves me feeling down ... I'll be glad when this week is over.

Daily Life

The first 2 weeks with Josie were incredibly difficult and many times I wanted to put her on craigslist but felt like God kept telling me to keep her. We are over the hump now and Angie isn't growling at her quite so much, so I think it's going to work. Mostly, Phil is training her because he's home all the time. He actually found them sleeping in Josie's bed together the other day.

Having 2 dogs, we needed more piddle pads which was a problem because I couldn't find the ones we like and because the store-bought ones are very expensive and the wrong sizes. I ended up going to thrift stores and getting old mattress pads, baby flannel blankets, and vinyl-backed tablecloths and making my own. I cut out the different layers and simply serged them together. Now we have 15 new ones plus the old ones and, most importantly, the dogs are using the new ones. Yes!

We got the top part of the driveway re-graveled for the first time in probably 10 years and it's so nice not to go bump * bump * bump when parking in the carport. Hopefully next week the guy will come to pump out the septic tank. It's supposed to be done every 3 years or else you can have big trouble which we don't need, especially with Phil's dependence on the bathroom.

Phil seems to be adjusting to "disabled" life fairly well, although it's been a huge life change for both of us. He mostly sits or sleeps in his recliner day and night. As long as he stays home, he can manage his life fairly well. He tries to help around the house but didn't/couldn't clean the house for the past 2 weeks, so I did it the other day and it felt so good to have it cleaned the way I like it to be cleaned. Sometimes I feel like it isn't my house anymore.

I think I am finally beginning to wind down from tax season/full-time work. Normally, when I go to part-time in May, I relax and am happy but not this year. This year I was in emotional turmoil because I was facing the fact that Phil will never work again and will be home ALL THE TIME. I have always needed time alone, so this has been very difficult for me to deal with.

When I think of all the trauma that Jesse, our youngest who is now 20, has had to go through with Phil's health problems over the last 5 years or more, I feel bad but yesterday God used some of that experience for good in his life. Jesse was alone with someone who passed out unexpectedly and, although it was scary, he knew exactly what to do and what to expect because Phil passed out last year. God can use even really bad stuff for good.

In several weeks, toward the end of July, we will leave to go visit my mother in Ohio. Every year I feel overwhelmed at the thought of making this trip and every year we have a great time and I am so grateful for the opportunity to see her again. This year, Eva will be coming with me and we hope that Jesse will be able to come too. Eva has longed to see her grandmother but hasn't been able to come for the past several years due to childbearing. Kevin will stay home and take care of the kids. (I almost said *babysit* but since he is their father, he's not really babysitting, right?) I am so grateful that God has answered my prayers to let my mom live until Eva could see her again.

Life sure turned out to be a lot harder than I thought it would be. I don't know why but I expected it to move in an orderly fashion through the years until we were old and happy. I thought the bad stuff would only happen to other people. This past month, I have had to die again to dreams and expectations. Things just didn't turn out the way I wanted them to. It's been very depressing and painful. Every day, I lay my life on the altar and give it to God and in that way I find peace. I am trying to live each day in the present and with a thankful heart.

Josie Joy

We finally did it! We got a new puppy! I found her on craigslist and she looks exactly like Angie, our beloved 10-year old dog. It was a big step but after thinking about it for several months, I decided we might as well try it and see how it goes. The idea was to get another dog so that Angie can help "train" her. Angie is the best dog we've ever had and having another dog will hopefully lessen our pain when she dies. Her mother died when she was 10 years old.

Josie was in the northern part of the state so our daughter met her first, sent me video, and told me I would love her. She picked her up today and then our son came with me to get her.

She is so tiny! It's hard to believe that Angie was ever this little! Eva's puppy, Molly, and Josie played and ran all over the house. They had so much fun together. I was concerned about whether or not Angie would accept her because Angie is, after all, an old lady now. At first she was wary but after a few hours she warmed up to her. I think if we give her time, they will become good friends.

I'm not very good at picking out dog names and originally wanted to name her Happy or Joy, but in the end, I named her after my grandmother. When I looked up the definition of Josie or Josephine, I discovered that it meant "God shall add" or "God shall increase" so her name means "God shall add joy" and that is what I long for.

Carry Me

When I went after work to spend time alone with God, I cried but didn’t know why. When I prayed for my sons, it was dry … but I did it anyway. (I'm praying for them every day.) There was a song asking God to carry me. When I got home, our wonderful neighbor was clearing some more of our field and burning the debris, so I quickly changed clothes, hooked up my cart and began to trim the brush around the driveway. Until my wonderful neighbor saw me and told me he would do it later … with his truck and chainsaw. So I drove all over the yard and trimmed low-lying branches. Because it had rained this morning, the temperature was reasonable and it was actually quite beautiful outside, so I impulsively decided to mow the yard. It felt so good in so many ways! It was so peaceful on the mower. Whenever I get on that mower, I am face-to-face with God's love and care and provision for me. Two hours of physical labor and my depression was gone, I felt very productive, and ready to proceed with my day. God did indeed carry me.