Anger

I haven't written in a while because I've been dealing with a lot of anger. Phil was unexpectedly released one week ago this morning and we found out a few days later that it was just gastritis. His stomach and esophagus were inflamed because he hadn't eaten much in a month. It was nothing that required a hospital but simply the decision to eat and drink no matter what. He is finally doing just that and is a whole lot better.

Last night I went to a worship service in a friend's home where they were webstreaming the service at IHOP in Kansas City. God has been moving at IHOP in wonderful ways since November. During the service, I felt like the Lord very clearly said to me, "You are powerless." This is the truth that I so often lose sight of. God is in control and I am not, so I might as well stop *trying* and rest.

And it doesn't matter that we made a mistake and kept running to hospitals when we didn't need to because God forgives us and He can cover it. He is my strength and my refuge. He is also my Provider. He provided the $1000 to pay the Cobra payment for next month and I am so grateful! That is always a difficult thing to face every month.