I grabbed these from a post on my 123 Stitch Message Board:
1. I think part of a best friend's job should be to immediately clear your computer history if you die.
2. Nothing sucks more than that moment during an argument when you realize you're wrong.
3. I totally take back all those times I didn't want to nap when I was younger.
4. There is great need for a sarcasm font.
5. How the he** are you supposed to fold a fitted sheet?
6. Was learning cursive really necessary?
7. Map Quest really needs to start their directions on #5. I'm pretty sure I know how to get out of my own neighborhood.
8. Obituaries would be a lot more interesting if they told you how the person died.
9. Bad decisions make good stories.
10. You never know when it will strike, but there comes a moment at work when you know that you just aren't going to do anything productive for the rest of the day.
11. I'm always a little terrified when I exit out of Word and it asks me if I want to save any changes to my ten-
page research paper that I swear I did not make any changes to.
12. 'Do not machine wash or tumble dry' means I will never wash this -- ever.
13. I hate when I just miss a call by the last ring (Hello? Hello? Darn it!), but when I immediately call back, it rings nine times and goes to voicemail. What'd you do after I didn't answer? Drop the phone and run away?
14. I hate leaving my house confident and looking good and then not seeing anyone of importance the entire day. What a waste.
15. I keep some people's phone numbers in my phone just so I know not to answer when they call."
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