Trust

From “The Shack” by William Paul Young

“As much as you are able, rest in what trust you have in me, no matter how small, okay?”

Be Ye Thankful

I am thankful that God brought me out of the dominion of darkness and into the Kingdom of His Son. Everything else is secondary.

Some of the secondary things:

My family

God saved & healed Phil

My 3 incredible children are my treasures
and the best thing I did with my life

My 2 grandchildren are my treasures and my reward

My mother has become my friend

My best friend, Jean, who loves me unconditionally

My wonderful job which I love

God's faithful provision through all the storms of life

Being able to email Zach

The outlet of creativity

Streamers Everywhere

Streamers, streamers everywhere! I have spent the past week sewing lame streamers and it’s been a lot of fun! I have made some for myself and for Eva and the rest to sell. Jean, my friend in Conway, is going to a church that is embracing expressive worship big-time and she wanted to have some worship tools available for people to purchase for Christmas gifts. I am happy to oblige! Once you get to *know* lame, it is really quite easy to work with and the colors are exquisite. It feels like I’m sewing with light!

Relationship

From “The Shack” by William Paul Young

“If I were simply One God and only One Person, then you would find yourself in this Creation without something wonderful, without something essential even. And I would be utterly other than I am.”

“And we would be without …?” Mack didn’t even know how to finish the question.

“Love and relationship. All love and relationship is possible for you only because it already exists within Me, within God myself.”

From “The Shack” by William Paul Young

“To begin with, that you can’t grasp the wonder of my nature is rather a good thing. Who wants to worship a God who can be fully comprehended, eh? Not much mystery in that.”

Shoulds

I have lived my life being a good little girl, doing the things I should do. Some people just have that kind of personality. It’s not a bad thing, but there can be excesses, especially when you have the responsibility for taking care of a chronically ill family member.

I find that I have forgotten how to do the things I *want* to do. Most of the time, I don’t even know what I want - because I am so used to being given (by life or by God or by my overactive conscious) a list of things I *should* do, that I need to do.

A friend of mine, who is a therapist, has been known to tell his clients, “Stop *shoulding* all over yourself!” Good advice! I want to start being more aware of my *wants* and less aware of the *shoulds* in my life.

Unexpected Gift

Phil didn't return from the doctor's appointment yesterday for 3 hours! That was because he went by work afterwards and got involved in talking to his co-workers. He looked fine when he got home ... I think that starting back part-time on December 1 is going to work!

The dermatologist said he doesn't need to see him anymore! What an unexpected and precious gift! He gave him a schedule to follow which will have him completely off of Prednisone three weeks from today! How amazing! I am filled with hope!

The Shack

I am reading "The Shack" by William Paul Young for the second time, because I feel like God is speaking to me through this book. I can relate to what the main character, Mack, goes through because I have had a *shack* experience of my own over the past few years. I find myself drawn to the picture on the cover of a broken-down shack in the dead of winter. There have been times when my life seemed like that shack - beaten up, worn down, ugly, and worthless.

I highly recommend this book. The author tackles the tough questions. It is unorthodox, though, and I was glad that a friend warned me about that so I could be more open to it than I probably would otherwise have been.

Praise God!

I'm alone! I'm alone! I'm alone! Phil drove himself to the doctor (local)!!! This is truly heaven! I'm going to work on a project for next Christmas and then I might cut out some streamers!

Streamers

The last time I visited my daughter’s church, they were teaching my grandson how to worship! When the music started, his teacher brought him into the back of the sanctuary and showed him how to lift his hands to the Lord. She even gave him some little finger cymbals to use and some sticks to rub together (or use to beat on a chair like a drum!). I was greatly moved by this - I don’t ever think I have seen anyone *teach* a little child how to worship.

I cut three streamers that I had into two pieces each to make shorter streamers for Alex and kids his age and longer streamers for the older kids. I even found three shorter sticks that were already made! It was so cool because I had made the streamers years ago and ended up never having the opportunity to use them, so it took all of five minutes.

I want to give these to that sweet church as gifts. In two weeks, I plan on being there for church and I will bring them at that time and also a few wrist ribbons. I plan on giving them to the woman in charge of my grandson’s class because she’s the one teaching him how to worship. This just delights my heart!

The Manger

My son and I were talking on the way to visit my mother in Ohio this past summer and somehow the subject of Christmas came up. Last year was the first time I didn’t put up a tree and it turned out to be a good thing because I ended up at my daughter’s house over Christmas because she needed help after her baby was born. When I mentioned that I really liked not having to put up the tree, my son replied that it was fine with him if we didn’t have one this year.

When I wondered where we would put the gifts, he replied, “Well, we could put them in a manger since that was where the GIFT was laid.” Even though he now says he was joking, I have not been able to stop thinking about that. I think it’s a great idea! But I had no clue how to make a manger.

While I realize that Jesus was probably laid in a stone manger inside a cave, I wanted to make a more modern interpretation of one, so I bought a wooden folding luggage rack at Walmart. To my surprise, it was easier than I thought. All I had to do was attach a black strap to the bottom to hold it open at just the right depth. Then I laid burlap over the top (to represent Christ’s humanity) and gold lame on top of that (to symbolize His divinity). I think it looks great, especially with the gifts in it. I might attach little white lights around it because Christ is the Light of the World.

Making Vests

I made 3 vests today to wear when it gets cold this winter. They came together rather well, which made sewing a joy. My mother, who is an excellent seamstress, always said that when you are sewing, your iron is your best friend. I completely agree but have discovered two more “best friends” - my serger and single fold bias tape.

I bought my serger quite a few years ago because two friends who were avid sewers kept singing the praises of them. For a while I didn’t quite know what to do with it but decided to apply myself diligently to learn how to use it. Now, I don’t know what I did without it! It finishes edges beautifully and quickly and saves me loads of time. I got a White, which is very easy to thread.

I have only recently discovered single fold bias tape. A friend told me that it is wonderful to use to finish armhole edges. I found an online tutorial - See this link - and off I went. What a truly useful product! It is so much fun to use that I actually look forward to doing the armholes! It is easy to use and makes the finished product look professional.

I discovered another trick this time around. My back starts hurting when I sew for a long time but today I tried sitting in my recliner whenever I had to pin and that did the trick! By getting up and moving to a comfortable position, my back lasted several hours longer than usual which enabled me to finish the vest.

Massage Therapy

My massage was absolutely wonderful! I enjoyed every single second! It is always a very healing experience. It’s like I can feel the stress being forcefully pushed off of my shoulders and back. Because of finances, it was a difficult decision to allow myself this luxury but it is the single most important and good thing that I do for myself every month.

A Thoroughly Wonderful Day

Jesse and I went to Rogers for Gabe's birthday and we brought their new dog to them. Eva picked out a dog from a pug rescue website, only to discover that she was actually located in a foster home close to us, so we offered to bring her up there to them. She is a very nice, sweet dog and really liked Jesse a lot because he held her most of the way. She made the trip up there more fun. The boys loved her and she was good with them. Eva loved her too and even Kevin bonded with her. They named her Ginger and then Alex started calling her Gingerbread, so that’s her official name.

Everything went well and was a lot of fun. Eva and I managed to get away for a bit and went to a cross stitch store that I heard about on my message board. It was really nice. On the way home, Jesse and I got into some spiritual discussions that were deep. I love being with my kids. They are deep thinkers and a lot of fun too. I enjoy their company tremendously.

Gabe is walking everywhere like he’s been doing it forever but he only started within the last two weeks. He smiles all the time, yet he makes it known when he’s not happy with something. He communicates very well. It’s hard to believe that a year ago, he was still inside of Eva. Alex and I seem to have a better relationship each time I see him. He is easy and pleasant to talk to and is very well-behaved now. He knows how to have fun and yet he seems more affectionate the past few months. I love them both so much. They are the joy of my life. Life just gets better and better as the kids get older. It’s so hard when they are young but sometimes I wish I had more of them because it’s so much fun when they’re older. It is so true what the Bible says - children are a blessing and a reward.

Conditional Love

We human beings love God conditionally. We are such conditional people. We love God … unless we perceive that He hurts us in some way. We love Him unless He lets someone die that we care about and we especially turn against Him if the person was young. We love Him unless He *lets* us get chronically ill. We love Him unless He allows us to get fired or to lose our job and asks us to work in a job we hate. We love Him until we don’t understand what He is doing in our lives. It’s a good thing that He loves us unconditionally and understands our weakness.

Tender Loving Care

I feel God's tender presence. He is holding me like I am a fragile vase. It's like He knows that I am bruised and broken and He is being careful not to let me be destroyed. He has been ministering to me in the area of finances, reassuring me that He will provide during this stressful time and I don't have to worry. We found out last week that in order to keep our health insurance, we have to pay close to $1000 a month ... at a time when Phil is on leave-without-pay. The future is uncertain but we are used to this now because that is the way we have been living for 6 years. We have hope, though, that Phil will come out of this soon and will be able to work steadily again. Whether he does or whether he doesn't, we will still praise the Lord because He is good.

Vegetable Soup

November 1 is always a good day. Because of the time change, I wasn’t able to sleep in very much and have already put together a colorful, healthy, gorgeous, and hopefully delicious vegetable soup in the crock pot. This is my plan from now on - to make a vegetable soup on Sundays - and it only took 10 minutes because I chopped up the veggies when I got home from the grocery store. I’ve been eating huge and wonderful salads every day for lunch too. About a week ago, I asked God to show me how to incorporate vegetables into my life and He did. He has also blessed me with a craving for them that I have never had in my whole life. They are so beautiful and so tasty! Where have they been my whole life?